Passion or no passion or half way or to be.

Je réfléchis beaucoup ces temps-ci. Je réfléchis à ce que je fais présentement, ce que je ferais plus tard. Je réfléchis à la personne que je suis et aux personnes qui m'entourent.

J'ai rencontré un gars récemment. Un gars que j'aimerais côtoyer mais qu'il «n'est» pas (essayez de comprendre! ça doit être le Descartes en moi qui prend le dessus) C'est un gars vraiment super. Ce qui me fascine le plus en lui est sa volonté d'atteindre ses buts, ses rêves. Il m'en fait souvent part et j'apprécie beaucoup. Cependant, ça me ramène souvent à une réalité qui me rend souvent ... Je suis encore dans la brume. De connaître réellement qui te plaît, d'être décidé et d'être vrai envers soi est l'une des plus belles choses qui soit. J'essaie de me mettre à l'idée que peut importe l'âge, le temps qu'il faudra, je trouverai, moi aussi, la ou les choses qui me passionnent dans la vie. J'ai tendance à évité ce genre de sujet. Peut-être qu'il est temps que je passe plus de temps à y réfléchir sérieusement, car ce dont je me rend compte, c'est à quel point connaître la chose qui te passionne et connaître les moyens pour y parvenir jouent un rôle majeur sur le bonheur d'une personne.

J'essaie encore de distinguer les caractéristiques du rêve. Un rêve est définit comme suit selon le contexte: Représentation, plus ou moins idéale ou chimérique, de ce qu'on veut réaliser, de ce qu'on désire. Ce qui est certain, c'est que les responsabilités ont plutôt tendance à inhiber les rêves. J'ai souvent pensé que l'idéal est inatteignable quoique se rapprocher de l'ideal, c'est possible. Penser le contraire serait être pessimiste. Est-ce possible de faire toutes les choses qui nous passionnent dans la vie?

Beaucoup de choses me plaît, la question est de savoir si ces choses là me passionne. J'aime aider et je suis sincère. Je suis loin d'être irritable lorsqu'il m'arrive des mésaventures. De plus, je suis dans un domaine ou le personnel donne beaucoup et reçoit peu. Je suis d'accord, il est possible que ça puisse miner mon humeur, je le concède mais ce métier me rejoint beaucoup sur plusieurs aspects. Je ne me suis jamais dis non plus que je voudrais être infirmière depuis toute petite, jamais, mais je crois que je me plaît bien dans ce domaine et que ce plaisir, cet amour envers ce metier peut prendre de l'ampleur avec le temps. Je suis patiente. Donc, comme je l'ai mentionné, mes responsabilités jouent un rôle important. Mes responsabilités face aux personnes que j'aime. Serait-ce la raison que me retient d'être a un certain point libre? Enfin, je pourrais rentrer en bien plus grande profondeur à ce sujet mais pour l'instant, je coupe ça court! Sans mentionner que ce n'est surtout pas l'argent qui est à l'origine de mes questionnements.

Réalité ou rêves? Le mot «rêve» semble être un si grand mot. Pourtant, pour une personne, le rêve peut être simple mais si significatif.
Je laisse maintenant place à la réflexion et surtout, je me laisse du temps pour moi.

New dorwingz and nu...cashews :)

I just needed to take a break from my school assignments, get here and type whatevers ... on my mind, because it really, definitely needs to get out of this grey, gewy, unsensitive and sticky substance called brain. Well. I call it Janice but that's a whole other story.

I finally did my exams-of-the-death. As expected, the day was very tiring, I was litterally drained to the bones and for the first time, I had three coffees in a single day. Holy wowey.

I am now working on my internship assignments.

Hmm. Here's the video of the week :) Makes me feel so happy! :) It also makes me think of so many things as well.





The Piggy of my dream :O !! I find this one good although not as original... since I saw a potato chips commercial and they had a flying pig as their logo! Anyways. Still cool since I made it ;) Besides, who wouldn't resist a jubilant pig?



Ooh my! The wind! I love making leaves and swirls! I made this one night while doing my homework and I actually drew it on a portfolio. Lack of material ressources (A) ... And now that I am watching this again, makes me think of this carefreeness feeling I wish I had at times... *sigh* Move on hun! Haiii!! :D

Updates on my (not so personnal) life.

So this is my first entry of the beginning of school year. I haven't had much time to write before that... and even NOW I'm not even suppose to be here typing what I am typing now. But hey. it's cool.

So what happened during the last few months *flashback* ( '_____' insert sound effect).

During summer, I had my VERY FIRST JOB! YAY. It was great. Plus, I made my own money! I had to chance to work with great professionals and patients. I had to work during the day, the evening and the night. Even though daytime is quite a rush, for some reason, I really appreciated it.

Back to school has been quite a rumble. It doesn't even surprise me anymore. Also, making my own money means... eh, paying my own scholar fees. Yep. But it's alright. As usually, Nursing scholar fees cost me an arm.

I'm in pediatry/perinatality. The course is sooo charged. They don't give us enough time to assimilate the theory! The most ridiculous exam we had was based on two subjects. The time allowed was thirty minutes! ... *breathe in* ... *breathe out* Anyways. Other than that, biology is harder than last semester, wayyy harder and I almost did not pass. ''Thank god I passed my biology exam!''

And it is far from being over people. Next week, I'll be having two huge exams and each one contains two never-ending subjects! Shoot me. And to finish me clean-cut, I have a math exam on medications and injections, hurray.

In two weeks, PRIMO : for my first intern, I'll have to teach security mesures to 4 year-old kids in a kinder-garden. I am really looking forward to it :) But I think one of them is hyperactive and his teacher calls him a time-bomb. Lol. How nice. Anyways! We'll have to deal with it.

SECUNDO: Pediatrical Intern at Maisonneuve hospital! So many things to prepare! It is kind of making me nervous! But as long as I'm well prepared, there is no need to stress. Right? *cricket noises*

Oh, and what to say about sociology and gym. Their at the bottom of my list. Ha. But at least, I know I'm doing alright! Hum... I still have to do 8 hours off-class in gym and humm other few hours of lab practice before intern.

Anyways, even though I feel kind of overwhelmed by exams and studies, this doesn't stop me of cooling down with my close friends and have a great time with my family occasionnaly.

I personnaly think studies are not an excuse but you just need to find a great balance between friends, family, yourself and school.

Be riiiiiight back.

It is 7:17 AM. I am having my breakfast, great hot coffee and a plain bagel. I am working at 8 AM. wooo! I have been pretty lazy these days updatin' my blog but be sure I will come back soon! :)

The Phoenix

I've been watching one of my favorite late night shows yesterday, Saturday Night Live but exceptionally, it wasn't that great. I don't know. The special guest was Seth Rogen (a Canadian. YES-SIR!). That guy's so cute I gotta admit, well he's not one of those muscled guys or uber hot actors but I don't know, I'm more into dorks, geeks or what you call *average guy*. Anyways, just to say he wasn't that great on SNL even though I loved him in Pinapple express, Zack and Miri Make a porno and 40 years old virgin.


Oh and yeah, he also did Master Mantis in Kung Fu Panda.

Of course, I couldn't resist watching the show until the end but while watching, I found myself happily surprised to see The Phoenix perform Live. Briefly, Phoenix is a band from France making English Indie music and their music is quite great. Refreshing. Original. Really. First time I heard about them was on Myspace, remembering being all excited about their music, listening to them loud in the house. And now performing on SNL. Can't wait to purschase their Album.



Another thing... Oh my god! Hugh Laurie from TV series House is Britain. Thought he was an american, oh well proves he's a good actor.

Almost missed.

I opened and closed the front door behind me. It made a swiftly noise and ended with a dull thud. The kind of noise you lose yourself into when you're lonely... I opened the next one, looked down and took my shoes off. Another exhausting day at school precisely done at 5PM. Walked in and saw my sister watching daily news on TV sitting on the sofa. She looked at me and said it was gone to be sold. I couldn't believe it but she sounded pretty firm in her statement. I laughed, took my jacket off, hung it, and entered my bedroom. I put my Pj on and came out. Headed to the basement. It wasn't there. "Alright" I said to myself. Took a snack and I was ready to tackle my biology assignments.

"ADH and Aldosterone are secreted which increase H20 and Na+ absorption. This secretion will then increase blood volume, increase presystolic volume, cardiac frequency and the volume of blood ejected. The cardiac output will be raised. Therefore, blood pressure will be raised as well ... Since BP = CO x CF. " (...)

- Snack

- "In a hospital, a person's put to bed for several days. She feels dizzy and might fall. That's the reason why it is very important to slowly lift her , first make her sit and then let her get use to it for few minutes before standing her up... "

- Snack

- Snack

- TV

"When you are in a lateral position, your blood vessels and heart are on the same level, which make it easier for the blood to circulate, so less contriction of the vessels (dilated). When changing posture, your BP decreases and the blood falls to the bottom since the nervous system did not have to time to adapt to the situation, to make the vessels constrict. With that being said, blood goes down, nothing to feed dzee brain, equals dizziness. To retablish the BP, the NS will increase the heart contractility, raise CF and make vessels contrict. CO and Resistance will raise substancially..."

- Assignments

- Dinner

- TV

Still not there. I felt all weird inside. What if it wasn't a joke? What if it'll never come back again? I sat in front of the television, but my eyes were looking down. The same level it usually was. I felt sad. I felt guilty and wished I could see it one more time to say 'Bye'. (...) Useless piece of black and white stinky thing that can't even listen to me when I ask it to. Yeah, you. Fatty who keeps on destroying most of the things I once owned. Gniah. I don't care. And yet. Who'll jump all around and stand up to my knees everytime I come back from school? Who'll run like a mad boar when... (...) like a mad boar. It is the only one who possesses the two most weird reflecting mirrors ever. Fart, snore, sit, sleep, eat. Silly.

12:30AM and still not there. Finally decided to believe it. Went back to my room. Closed the door and again, that dull thud. Fucking annoying shit. Just leave me alone. (sigh) Slipped between the blankets and fell asleep.

6AM Classical music on the radio, my everyday alarm. Get's up. Fix my bed and go wash my face. Change clothes. Loses my Pj comfort for the less appeal I still own. Deep breath, stairs. Cage. It's there. Snoring. Farting like whatever. Stood on my knees. "GIMMIIE BIIG KIISS MII DOGGIE" Hugs. Breakfast. Promise I'll take it out later. And life goes on...

Maybe with a little bit more love I guess.

PS My brother took Azul (my dog) to the farm to see some friends and came back home at 2AM.

L'art de l'insulte d'Arthur Schopenhauer par Franco Volpi

When I go to the library, I often find myself in the philosophy section. Pff. Probably because it is the first thing that comes across my mind. Have you ever thought about reading all the books avaible? Makes me sad. I don't even know where to start. Anyways, I rent a book from time to time and it makes me happy :)



So yesterday, I got this great book called L'Art de l'Insulte from the great pessimist, I mean philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer. In this book, Schopenhauer uses insolence and provocation with a slight subtility arguing on different thematics almost structured as a glossary which makes it easy to understand and read. While arguing, people may use insults as their last resort or simply not even think about it but for Schopenhauer, damn those structured arguments, lets jump right into action, even if you know you're wrong. The person who gets insulted and mad loses. But be careful, chose your ''opponent'' wisely! The philosopher treats about women, Hegel, god, faith, animals, men, humans, education, other philosophers, etc. Nobody spared.

I really enjoyed this book, well for a book a chose randomly of course haha. It's a book to read... hm... seriously? yet with a smile in the corner and tainted with many "pssshhh" . lol ;)

Here are few quotations:

"Pour celui qui étudie afin de parvenir à la connaissance, les études et les livres ne sont que les barreaux de l'échelle qu'il gravit pour atteindre le sommet de la connaissance : dès qu'un barreau l'a élevé d'un pas, il l'abandonne. Par contre, les autres, nombreux, qui étudient pour remplir leur mémoire, n'utilisent pas les barreaux de l'échelle pour monter, mais ils les démontent et les chargent pour les emporter en se réjouissant du fardeau de plus en plus lourd. Ils resteront éternellement en bas, car ils portent ce qui aurait du les porter" p71.

"Pour symboliser l'insolence et la sottise, on devrait prendre la mouche. En effet, pendant que tous les animaux craignent l'homme avant tout et le fuient de loin déja, elle se pose sur son nez" p53.

"Seules les pensées que l'on a soi-meme sont vraies et vivantes : car ce sont les seules que l'on comprend. Les pensées étrangères, lues, sont des chiures de merde" p68.

"La mémoire est une chose capricieuse et versatile, comparable à une jeune fille. Il arrive qu'elle refuse de facon tout à fait inattendue ce qu'elle à cédé cent fois et le propose tout naturellement plus tard, quand on n'y pense plus" p69.

"Lorsque l'on étudie le bouddhisme d'apres ses sources, tout s'éclaire; il n'y a là absolument aucun bavardage stupide sur le monde créé à partir du néant et sur un type surgi soudain qui l'a fait. Pouah, quelle saleté!" p77.

''La plume est à la pensée ce qu'est la canne à la marche: mais la marche la plus légère est celle sans canne, et la pensée la plus parfaite se déroule sans plume; c'est seulement lorsque l'on commence à vieillir que l'on aime se servir de la canne comme de la plume" p145.

"Le désir de connaissances, lorsqu'il porte sur le général, s'appelle désir de savoir (Wissbegier), lorsqu'il vise le particulier, il s'appelle curiosité (Neugier). - Les garcons manifestent le plus souvent un désir de savoir; les petites filles de la simple curiosité, mais celle-ci à un degré stupéfiant et souvent avec une facheuse naiveté" p164.

Hommage aux dimanches de la vie.

C'est dimanche, dimanche, dimanche.
Le jour avant lundi, mardi, mercredi, jeudi, vendredi et samedi... ou tout simplement le jour d'après, dépendamment du point de vue de chacun.
Le seul jour qui ne fini par par 'di' mais qui tout de même le commence.
Le jour qu'on se réveille tard en matinée puisque samedi fut le jour de la fêtée.
Le jour ou il ne se passe habituellement rien de spécial.
Le jour avant la semaine des cours.
Le jour ou on se fixe des objectifs afin de les accomplir avant ces cinq journées tarrées.
Le jour ou on jure de dormir plus tot.
Le jour lorsqu'on étudie à la dernière minute avant l'examen du lendemain.
Merci aux dimanches de la vie.
Nous laisser nager en apnée en ta seule journée.
Malgré cela, il est déja minuit et je ne suis toujours pas au lit!

Anyways, class are starting at 12:00, take that Sunday! *pew pew*

Drawings.

One of my old drawings, very simple.

Another drawing, unfortunately I haven't created this. I copied this from an image I found on Deviantart.com but I had fun doing this, the crazy waves and the cherry blossoms I modified, great.

Flying pigglets are to come!

Starter.

The title says it all!

First of all, i gotta say that ... my blog's title is awesome! I use Pnuts kind of everywhere but the Flying pigglets?! gosh this is great :P It came up to me instantly, it actually gives me an idea on what to draw. Yeah I haven't drew much these days, lack of time, imagination, and blahs!

Annyways, so yes. So is Blogging dzee new journal, without paper? what are the differences? I joined not only because I wanted to type stuff but also because I wanted to post images, pictures, hmm.. can I do that around here? probably. oh and meet new people is always a plus of course.

Alright... wish me goodluck!

pnuts.